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ONE THOUGHT ON FOX HUNTS



In this realm we call ‘Earth’, the glorious diversity of God’s creation has led to the development of some eccentric traditions. Many of these revolve around the peculiar relationship between mankind and the animal kingdom.

For instance, the Spanish have developed a habit of dancing around bulls, the native Americans like wrestling alligators and the Chinese enjoy eating bats.

Whilst these actions seem bizarre from afar, they represent an essential, irreplaceable part of the cultures from which they were born.

The Spanish are flamboyant risk-takers who possess the capacity for lethal violence.

The native Americans lived a more ‘hands-on’ natural life than almost any other people.

And the Chinese, well, the Chinese are just weirdos. They’ll eat anything.

Literally… anything.

Cats, dogs, bats, you name it, the Chinese will boil it alive and serve it as soup.

As British people, we should not be quick to judge these quirky customs for two reasons:

Firstly, because people are defined by their traditions. Upholding your heritage represents a glorious expression of gratitude to one’s ancestry. This behaviour should not be attacked but revered.

And secondly, because we have one or two controversial conventions of our own.

You see, though it is politically incorrect to say, nothing makes a British man happier than chasing a fox with a pack of dogs and shooting it in the face.

Fox hunting has five main benefits:

  • It eradicates vermin
  • It honours those who came before us
  • It reminds people that animals are losers and humans are superior to them
  • It inspires a level of community comradery typically only found during war
  • And finally, it annoys all of the right people


All heterosexual british men love fox hunting, but please comprehend that this is a confusing and contentious topic amongst British women. It’s a catch-22 for women because whilst they usually like to champion the rights of fluffy, cute animals… they are also instinctively attracted to violent, murderous men.

It’s probably best to never bring it up, but if you do try to convince a modern woman that fox hunting is good, try to focus on the required attire for a hunt. The opportunity to go shopping for Pinks, boots, and leather gloves will definitely win her over. If not, distract her with discussions about horses and dogs.

Fox hunting is an important upper-class British tradition, so naturally, the enemy waged war against it.

Unfortunately, they succeed in subverting British culture by passing the Hunting Act of 2004. This essentially made fox hunting forbidden. The rhetoric used to justify the ban was ridiculous. Tony Blair described fox hunting as being ‘cruel and unnecessary’.

Presumably, his slaughter of 500,000 innocent people in the Iraq war was deemed ‘compassionate and necessary’.

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